Monday, May 3, 2010

Tough as Nails

Never, ever have I had long nails. Between being rough on my hands and nervously biting them, they never even had a shot. Maybe its all the vitamins I'm taking or a less physically-demanding day job, but they're growin' like weeds.

That by itself is not revelatory. (duh) But what they've done for my sense of femininity? It's bizarre. And surprising. Somehow, being able to tap my nails and paint them to some effect has made me more conscious of being female. Proud of having curves. Happy to be a little girlie.

Until now, I'd glossed over that beautiful middle ground between tomboy and overdone time-suckingly coiffed woman. But nails... they suit me. In an hour, I can go from sweet and innocent lavender (the hot May shade, I've heard) to bad-ass black with blue sparkles to channeling my inner vixen with blood red. Hello self-expression for the personality conflicted.

I think I'm gonna keep them, despite the time needed to file and the dirt that gets stuck under there when gardening without gloves (I'm still struggling to remember the gloves before I'm wrist-deep in loam). They're almost a more versatile accessory than purses and shoes--cheaper, too.

What about you? What gives you that surprisingly feminine edge? Do you hate having long nails, or revel in it?

Skylar, who's nails are currently fuchsia.

Friday, April 30, 2010

When Enough is Enough

I like writing sex scenes--really I do. However, that doesn't mean I think it's particularly easy to do. I know there are people who disagree, but at the risk of repeating myself again (because I know I've already said this several times before) I think it's a whole lot easier to write sex badly than well.  Which is why I was somewhat less than thrilled when one of my editors recently asked me to add and/or expand several sex scenes to my newly contracted book.

Not that I objected, exactly. The book had surprised me by turning out to be a lot more "sweet" than I'd originally intended. I'd written it to adhere to a very specific (and very short) word length, which meant I'd cut out or glossed over a lot more of the story than I would have otherwise. Since that word length limit no longer applied, I was actually pretty happy to be given the chance to rectify the oversights, to expand the book and delve a little deeper into the characters' motivations. But, after three rounds of edits, I think we all (me, my editor and even the characters) had reached our limits. To add even one more scene, at that point, would have been gratuitous. 

In real life, you could maybe get away with something like that. But fiction's not so forgiving. Gratuitous sex in fiction is just plain boring. And there ain't nuthin' sexy 'bout that. 

I am firmly of the opinion that sex, just like any other aspect of fiction, has to move the story forward in some fashion. If it doesn't, it probably doesn't belong in the book. Again, I know there are people who'd disagree with that statement...and I really wish they'd stop writing 'cause I've read some of their stories and they're boring as hell.  

It's not just a matter of numbers, either. There are some amazing books that seem at times to be almost wall to wall sex, but it totally works because that's how the characters interact with each other and you're shown something new about them in every scene. But then I've read other books where the h/h just stop and have sex at the most random places within the story and for no discernible purpose. Well, okay, I guess they sort of have a purpose, but it was by no means a good, solid,  plot-moving, character illuminating, relationship defining purpose. And those are really the only ones that count.   
  
So what about you? Where do you draw the line? What turns you off about sex in fiction? And, as a reader, what makes you say "enough is enough"?

Thursday, April 29, 2010

13 Things I Bought in Fargo

Here's my first attempt at Thursday Thirteen and sorry if it's the lamest thirteen ever. Last weekend my husband and I went away for a weekend WITHOUT OUR KIDS. Not that I was excited or anything. A couple of weeks ago fellow 9NN Meg Benjamin talked about her trip to Santa Fe. Well, I got to go to Fargo, North Dakota! Don't laugh! It was exciting!

We did venture out of the hotel to do a little cross-border shopping and here are 13 things I bought:

1. silver flipflops (2.50 at Target!! We don't have Target here.)

2. gladiator sandals

3. shoes


4. Purse (it came with a bonus umbrella!)



5. black Capri leggings

6. jeans – skinny with a cuff



7. yellow, red and blue dishes (for my yellow, red and blue kitchen)

8. outdoor rug for our deck

9. jeans from Aeropostale for my daughter (we don’t have that store here)

10. T-shirts from Hollister for my son (we don’t have that store here)

11. T-shirt from Abercrombie & Fitch for me (we don’t have that store here)

12. underwear from American Eagle for my husband (we DO have that store here, but he can't be bothered to go out and buy underwear for himself)

13. red and black slutty lingerie for me (okay for my husband) (sorry, no photo!)

Wednesday, April 28, 2010

Growing Stones

Have you ever thought to yourself, that’ll never happen to me? I thought that once, but then I found myself in the ER with a kidney stone. I’ve listened to others talk about it. I’ve heard the news of my brother, my sister and my husband’s brothers suffering from the ailment a time or two…or more, but I never knew the word “suffering” until now.

In mid-March, while sitting in my day-job’s office, a tightness had started in my back and side. I’d thought I was having a muscle spasm. By the time I’d left work, the pain had increased. When early evening had rolled around, I’d wanted someone to hit me over the head with a two-by-four.

After an evening visit to an Immediate Care Center, then a visit to my local ER two days later, both of which dismissed it as a UTI and sent me home with antibiotics, I’d finally received a referral for a scan.

And what do you know…a lodged kidney stone.

Then the adventure truly began.

There are several things I’d learned during the adventure. The first had been that Stadol is the bomb! That being said, let’s move on to the second one.

A lot of conversations go on in the ER, and it seems sitting behind a curtain make sthe voices louder.

One particular “ER mate” had proven rather comical. She had a habit of clearing her throat, which to me had sounded more like hawking a loogie. Though the sound had turned my stomach, it evidentially had no affect on the soundee.

The woman had continuously talked about food, whether it was crispy fried potatoes or chocolate. Her “there’s a rumbly in my tummy” had almost made me laugh out loud. The bed busting fart she’d emitted had managed to break my restraint.

My humor had quickly ebated when a nurse pushed aside the curtain and entered my little sterilized domain with the unsettling news she had to obtain a lean urine sample via a quick cath. Little did I know it takes three nurses to achieve such a task, especially when the first nurse had failed to operate the contraption correctly. All was well when the task was completed, and the three went on their way.

I’d finally arrived at my private suite, which had been just big enough for the bed and a closet-size bathroom.

Speaking of bathrooms, I’d quickly discovered making the trip while maneuvering an IV pump wasn’t as easy as they make it look on television.

Another thing I’d learned was how little it takes to amuse the staff. Days before my self-imposed incarceration, I’d made a visit to the nail salon. My shiny blue nails with elegant white stripes lined with silver color and matching toe nails had incurred many a conversation. More than once the comment had been made that I didn’t look as though I belonged in the hospital, and I couldn’t have agreed with them more. There’d been a million other places I’d wished to have been.

While awaiting surgery, I’d found myself in the company of several vampire romance lovers, and of course I’d felt the need to tout my vampire romance series, The Watchers.

Stent in place, I’d been sent home to wait out the curing of a major infection before surgery to remove the stone.

Ever heard of a stent? It’s a wire that runs from your kidney to your bladder and feels as though you’ve got a coat hanger for a tampon. Not pleasant. Not pleasant at all.

You know, I do believe the surgical staff were in need of comic relief the day of my surgery. Before going under, comments on my, once again newly painted toenails which matched my fingernails filled the room. I shouldn’t have been surprised that while in recovery, I discovered one of the booties had disappeared, leaving exposed the nails which had amused the staff.

Another reason I say the staff must have been in rare form was the fact that a few days later I discovered a 4” piece of tape in a spot where I wouldn’t even pay someone to place and remove.

When I’d made the joke to my doctor as to how a 1” piece of tape should have sufficed, he’d laughed and referred to the tape on my leg to hold the string which was tied to the end of the stent to aid in removal.

My leg. Someone surely had not gotten the memo on that one, I thought as I recalled the “Ah! Kelly Clarkson” moment I’d had during remove of said tape.

Pulling the rip cord on the stent as the approved time had been the highlight of my adventure. It had meant I’d neared the end of the journey.

As I write this little ditty, I must say I’m feeling more and more like myself every day. And for that, I am truly grateful.

So, the next time you hear someone is suffering from a kidney stone attack, I hope you’ll remember my little tale on Growing Stones and offer your sympathy, because believe me, they deserve it.

D. (Diane) McEntire
www.dmcentire.com
The Watchers Series
Samhain Publishing

Tuesday, April 27, 2010

Guest Blogger Adele DuBois - The Handsome Face


I’m a sucker for a handsome face. I like men with symmetrical features who are easy on the eye. No ruggedly handsome, craggy types with a two-day stubble and unkempt hair for me. My fantasy hero has a smooth jaw line that doesn’t scratch my tender skin, a gorgeous face to match a well-toned body, and smells fresh enough to have stepped from the shower. He’s confident and commanding and not afraid to love a woman. That’s my type of man and the hero I created for DO ME GOOD.

The hero of DO ME GOOD, Gunnar, is my first otherworldly protagonist, and I admit I’ve developed a crush on him. He’s a fearless Nordic warrior cast into eternal servitude during a time when mortals served gods and goddesses. He becomes a celestial in the pre-Christian period before those who interacted with both gods and mortals were called angels. Gunnar is a Nordic Light Elf and so handsome he is “fairer to look upon than the sun.”

I hope you enjoy DO ME GOOD as much as I enjoyed creating this story. Here’s a sample of the book with a summary and excerpt. Thanks for reading.


*****

DO ME GOOD by Adele Dubois

Release Date: April 14, 2010, Ellora’s Cave

http://www.jasminejade.com/ps-8301-50-do-me-good.aspx

Summary:

Penny throws her hot, but worthless mooch of a boyfriend out on her front lawn with his clothes, and vows never again to be a bum magnet. Exhausted by overwork and mountainous debt, Penny pleads for divine intervention.

Gunnar, a rebellious Nordic warrior cast into servitude by an angry god to learn humility, answers. While Penny sleeps, the celestial arrives to complete her household chores, but she awakens and finds him. The handsome immortal kisses her, sparking a passionate, forbidden sexual encounter.

Dark forces seeking vengeance for Gunnar’s past misdeeds mark Penny as a target. To protect his lover, Gunnar tests immortality in a death battle using a god’s magical sword. But the strength of Penny’s love might be what saves them both.

Excerpt:

He smoothed the hair at her temple and then rubbed a thick tendril between his thumb and forefinger. “I am Gunnar.” He pronounced the name “Goo-nar”.

A coarse brand of the sun, surrounded by a circle on the back of his hand, and covering the areas between his thumb, index knuckle and wrist caught her eye. His hand looked muscular and powerful beneath her gaze.

She touched the scarred skin with the tips of her fingers while he held a length of her hair, recognizing Freyr’s sacred insignia from her textbooks. “The pain must have been excruciating.” Without thinking, she lifted the old wound to her mouth and laid four kisses against its perimeter before pressing a fifth to the emblem inside.

A low tremor vibrated across her lips as they touched the ancient symbol on the white, extended hand. The brand grew warm and then hot on her mouth, though it did not burn. Her lips tingled and her body hummed with the pleasant sensations. She ran her tongue over the thick scars to erase the heat and then licked the center with the tip of her tongue in a tiny swirl before lifting her head.

His gasp of surprise was the last thing she expected as he released her hair and leaned away.

“Have I offended you? I’m sorry.” She searched his face for clues as to what to do next. Behind his shocked expression she found desire and longing and something completely unexpected.

Thankfulness.

Penny waited for his reply without letting go of his disfigured hand. She could tell his next words didn’t come easily.

“Kindness isn’t something I’m used to finding. Perhaps you’d be less inclined toward compassion if you knew what I’d done to deserve this brand of servitude.”

She reached out and hooked her arm around his neck to bring his face closer to hers. “I am Penelope. And if you are from Alfheim, I know who and what you are. I just don’t understand why you’ve come.” How could she deserve his rare, benevolent gifts? She was just an ordinary woman, barely scraping by.

“Sometimes we get what we need, simply because we ask. That’s the beauty and power of the unexpected.” His warm breath grazed her cheek in shallow rushes, lifting goose bumps across her skin. His wide, firm mouth smelled of sweet ground parsley and fresh-picked mint.

Their gazes locked and held, assessing, appraising.

Searching.

Gunnar’s eyes were like pools of deep blue water speckled with light that pulled her in and down. Down. Her breathing slowed as the sound of her heartbeat intensified in her ears and the inside of her mouth moistened. She licked her lips and became intensely aware of every nerve ending shimmering along her body. Her muscles tensed as if waiting for something unexpected to happen.

As if meeting a Nordic Light Elf in the flesh wasn’t amazing enough.

Just when she wondered how his mouth would taste, he brought his lips to hers and kissed her. An explosion of kinetic energy shot vibrations through her body that prickled every fiber and muscle, held her taut and then released, leaving her breathless

****

Buy Link: http://www.jasminejade.com/ps-8301-50-do-me-good.aspx

Trailer:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-nvlyXEQUZk

www.adeledubois.com

www.adeledubois.com/blog

Monday, April 26, 2010

Bitten by Kelley Armstrong (Warning: Long)




Over at Smart Bitches a few months back, Sarah wrote about re-reading Kelley Armstrong’s Bitten and how much she loved it. It started a lively and, as always, intelligent and thought-provoking discussion. Some people loved Bitten, others threw it against the wall. People in the second group tend to hate the book because of either the heroine, or the hero, or both.

That’s what – or whom – I’ve been thinking about. Bitten isn’t a complex story, but it features two complex characters, and I think Armstrong was very brave in writing such characters her first time out. It’s easy to write characters that all readers will love, but such characters run the risk of being boring. Armstrong didn’t do that with her first novel. She took a lot of chances, challenging the reader to try to understand a hero who sometimes comes across as reflexively brutal and a heroine whose behavior ranges from baffling to really fucking annoying.

A lot of readers don’t like Elena because she’s an emotional pinball, going from passive, to passive aggressive, to petulant, to ass-kicking aggressive, back to passive – and then doing it all over, again and again. I find her exasperating, but I think her flaws make her an exceptionally believable character (aside from the turning into a wolf thing).

Ten years ago, Elena was bitten by her then-fiancĂ©, Clay. She didn’t know Clay was a werewolf; she didn’t know werewolves existed. Clay, a brilliant guy with a U-Haul’s worth of emotional baggage and very poor impulse control, loved Elena so much he wanted to turn her into a werewolf so they could stay together – even though no woman had ever survived a werewolf bite and even though he didn’t give Elena any choice in the matter. He’s sworn ever since he didn’t mean to do it and, given his self-control issues, that might be true.

Elena, defying all odds, survived. Now she’s the world’s only female werewolf, and she’s never fully accepted it.

The orphaned Elena grew up in a series of foster homes. All she ever wanted was to get married and have a family of her own. When he bit her, Clay destroyed her dreams of a normal, human family life. But even if marriage and kids is now out of the question, Elena still longs to settle down (somehow – she never quite explains how she thinks it will work) with Philip, her sweet, patient, oblivious human boyfriend. Even as she returns to the Pack’s home base to help deal with a crisis, starts sleeping with Clay again, and goes days without phoning home, Elena insists her future is in Toronto with Philip.

But in Toronto, Elena is perpetually hungry and claustrophobic. She’s starving with Philip, both physically and emotionally. She can’t ever eat enough to satisfy her werewolf’s metabolism, because she can’t let Philip know she’s not normal, and she never has enough room or enough time to give her werewolf side the freedom she needs. She has to sneak out in the dead of night to Change and run, trying not to disturb Philip and lying to him when she does. Still, she insists, this is the life she wants.

Bullshit.

She’s lying. She’s lying to herself, so she’s lying to us. Once we realize Elena’s an unreliable narrator, her annoying behavior (if she loves Philip, why’s she jumping Clay’s bones? if she’s still so pissed off at Clay, why doesn’t she do something like, you know, yell at him a little? how bad does she miss Philip if she never bothers to call?) makes sense. Elena may love Philip, but she’s in love with Clay. She wants to want a normal human life with Philip, but what she really wants is to stay in Bear Valley with Clay and the Pack, the family she never dreamed of.

She can’t let herself want that, though, because she hasn’t forgiven Clay for destroying her chance at a normal life. If she lets herself have what she really wants, then Clay gets what he wants – i.e., her. Which means he’ll be rewarded for his unforgiveable act of betrayal. In short, making herself happy means making Clay happy, and she doesn’t want to do that. Nose, face, spite. Given what she’s been through, I don’t really blame her.

Then there’s Clay. Oh, Clay. I love me some damaged alphas, and Clay is very damaged and very alpha.

Like Elena, Clay is a bitten – as opposed to born – werewolf, and he’s even more of a mess than she is. If he were human, we’d call him a sociopath.

It took me a while to figure out, but I finally realized who Clay reminds me of – Carol O’Connell’s New York City detective, Kathy Mallory. Like Clay, Mallory is brilliant and like Clay, she suffered childhood trauma of a type and severity that can’t ever be truly healed. While they can function – they feel, and love, and (mostly) refrain from preying on people weaker than they are, which is everyone – they’re not ever going to be anything close to normal. Expecting a Clayton Danvers or a Kathy Mallory to understand the normal rules of human behavior and human morality, much less adhere to them, is simply unrealistic.

Clay (like Mallory) has to use someone else as a moral compass because he never had a chance to develop one of his own. His moral compass is Jeremy, his Alpha and adopted father. Clay doesn’t think in terms of good vs. bad, or right vs. wrong. He thinks in terms of what Jeremy would approve or disapprove of. While he knows that what he did to Elena was wrong, it’s pretty obvious he only knows it’s wrong because Jeremy said so and because it made Elena leave him. He doesn’t truly understand what a violation it was. He still thinks of Elena as his wife, and he always will.

For people who don’t like Bitten – or who absolutely loathe it – the wall-throwing moment comes when Clay chases Elena through the woods, ties her up and rips her clothes off. She demands he release her, and he replies, “Since you can’t fight me, you can’t be expected to stop me. It’s out of your control.”

Now, that’s all kinds of fucked up. But Clay’s the survivor of a childhood werewolf attack who spent his formative years living alone in a swamp, subsisting on small animals and other children. He thinks he’s being chivalrous. Clay’s not evil. He’s not even malicious – he’s broken.

I understand why some readers don’t read past this scene, why some – especially those who’ve experienced actual sexual assault – find it offensive and infuriating. This type of sex scene was quite normal thirty and forty years ago, in what the Smart Bitches call Old Skool romances, but nowadays I think a lot of editors would tell an author they have to take it out.

Then it gets worse.

Clay proceeds to…what? He thinks he’s making love to Elena, but we can’t call it that because she’s freaking tied up. Still, it’s not rape, and we can’t be sure exactly how nonconsensual it really is.

“I won’t force you, Elena. You like to pretend I would, but you know I won’t. All you have to do is tell me no. Tell me to stop. Tell me to untie you. I will.” And then he repeats it, just for good measure: "Tell me to stop. . .Just tell me.”

Elena doesn’t say a word. She refuses to let herself come – that’ll show him, Elena! – but she doesn’t tell him to stop. This isn’t rape. I’m not even sure it falls under “forced seduction.” Despite her physical powerlessness, Elena could stop Clay at any moment, and she doesn’t.

No matter what she says, or thinks, Elena’s ambivalent about this episode even as it’s happening. The reader is left with the impression that at least part of her welcomes the loss of control Clay offered, just as he thought she would. That’s a risky way for an author to write a scene nowadays, and I think Armstrong had a lot of guts to do it.

I haven’t finished the book yet, but I’m near the end. Elena still hasn’t admitted that it’s Bear Valley she belongs in and Clay she belongs with. I know they end up together, both because it’s a romance novel and because I’ve read about the later books in the series. But even though I know they’re gonna get their HEA – or, since this is Clay and Elena we’re talking about, their Happily For The Most Part – I’m still enjoying reading two characters who aren’t entirely likeable right at first.

And I’m wondering if I have the nerve to write characters like that.

Friday, April 23, 2010

Social Networking (And my scream of terror)


In the last half hour on Twitter I saw a link to a post about how to use social networking as a writer, and then a post on how NOT to use social networking.

I know I have to use social networking. It’s the way of the world now, the way we communicate. I have a blog. I joined Facebook even though I didn’t really know what to do with it. A few old friends from high school found me. I figured out how to use Twitter even though it took a while for me to get it. (All these mini-conversations going on, how do you follow them? How do you know if someone replied to you? What’s the point of it?) Now there’s the whole “fan page” thing at Facebook. Apparently you aren’t supposed to use Facebook to promote your business. Well, since I do so little promoting on there, they haven’t outed me yet. But the other day I accidentally created a fan page. Sigh. Yes, I didn’t mean to do it. I was just trying to link Facebook and Twitter. I’ve already discovered how to link Goodreads to Twitter so everyone can see “what I’m reading now” and also lastfm, so everyone can know what my “loved tracks” are. It took me days to figure out how to link Facebook and Twitter; in the end it took a Google search and about three clicks of my mouse. But then I had this fan page. (I think). But I have no fans. And one of the big sins in the ‘how NOT to social network” bucket was sending people invitations to be your fan over and over. Eep. I don’t want to annoy people. I feel weird even asking someone to be my friend.

I know you’re supposed to Tweet and comment about things other than your new release, or your latest review; you’re supposed to interact with people. Be entertaining. But I’m not entertaining, I’m ordinary and boring.

I just went into Facebook and discovered I had 59 messages. Gah! What are all those? And how do people send them? Another piece of advice in the “how to use social networking” article: don’t avoid what you don’t understand. Gulp. I need lessons on Facebook. And being entertaining I think.
So if I try to be better at Facebook and I try to be more interesting, will you be my fan? Oh wait! It changed! You don’t have to be my fan now! You can just say you like me!

http://www.facebook.com/twitter/#!/pages/Kelly-Jamieson/113030128727964