Wednesday, November 21, 2012

Heartthrobs and Crushes

 My Diva, recently turned 11, is still the fierce tomboy who eschews dresses and make-up and hair brushing and showering. Boys are stupid and Justin Bieber posters are fit only for archery targets.

Look! It's a baby douchebag! What would you do to your daughter if she ever dated a guy wearing these pants?

I noted on Facebook the other day that as we were walking into Target, Diva noted she was wearing the same clothes she'd had on the day before. She'd spent the night on the couch (it was a weekend) surrounded by dogs, and her hair "couldn't [have been] more uncombed if I'd tried!" She was really proud of her unwashed, unbrushed, puppy-sleeping status.

When I recounted all this on Facebook, one of my friends commented with a single word: "Scout." And I was like - oh, yeah. I love Scout (aka Miss Jean Louise Finch, of To Kill a Mockingbird). But Scout, in the book and in the movie, is 6 years old. Diva just turned 11.

And since about 1962 - when both To Kill a Mockingbird  and Love Me Do were released -- eleven is the age about which a girl becomes susceptible to Heart Throb Syndrome.

(Ok - honestly? There's no reason to drag Scout Finch into this. But we watched the movie tonight, and Diva's reading it right now, and there is much in Scout's character that I see in Diva's as well.)

So on Facebook a few weeks ago, one of my friends--whose daughter is in Diva's class at school--mentioned that her girl was wanting to take tea at 3:00 pm every day because that's what the English do, and One Direction are English.


Yes, Diva's schoolmate's mom is getting tired of One Direction. And I don't blame her. I was SO glad Diva wasn 't into a particular band.

Until one day her armoire sprouted a poster of the kid from Austin and Alley. (I swear Disney is getting these teenagers from some Syd and Marty Kroft warehouse - they're all as pale and skinny as the corporately manufactured heart throbs I loved in the 70s.)

Oh - wait. Did someone mention heart throbs of the 70s?

Okay. My first real record - meaning a record only I would like, meant only for ME to play, was Donny Osmond Superstar.

I never joined the Mormon church. But I still like purple.
 It was given to me by an uncle when I was quite young (about Diva's age). I knew right away that I was Donny's Destiny. I insisted on buying only purple socks, and I told my mother I would be joining the Mormon church as soon as I was old enough.

Then, for about five minutes, I fell in love with Tony DeFranco.

 After that it was The Bay City Rollers.

Yes, people in the 70s were skinny and yes, it was because of drugs.
And then Shaun Cassidy

Also, at some point, Leif Garret.

He doesn't look like this anymore. Like, not at all.

[Note: I also remember David Soul and Bobby Sherman from Here Come the Brides, but I was really young when that was on TV and I'm not sure I can classify it as a heart throb.]

Of all the guys mentioned so far, only Shaun Cassidy still has a real career going.

He writes and produces. THAT'S where the lasting careers are made.

The Austin poster has come down, replaced by something animal-oriented.

It's going to happen again, though, and it's going to be worse next time.

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