Thursday, September 30, 2010

The Zillionaire Vampire Cowboy's Secret Werewolf Babies--Chapter 4

Chapter 4

Chastity screamed, aiming for that proper damsel-in-distress tone that her mother made her practice for hours on end. Rock's thunderous footsteps pounded down the stairs and over to her. As soon as he was within reach, Chastity did her best faint, counting on Rock to catch her—which he did.

What she did not expect was for him to start slapping her back to consciousness. "Chassy, baby, c'mon, wake up. You gotta tell me what made you scream," he drawled. She'd thought his voice sexy at one point, but now it just grated on her nerves. She needed a man with a classy voice. Like that rich man on the island on that TV show. She wasn't good with names, but she knew he had loads of money and spoke like it, too. But for now, she'd find a way to be happy with Rock, so long as he kept giving her presents.

She finally decided to stir, having had enough of his not-so-gentle ministrations. "Ooh, Rock," she cooed, batting her long fake eyelashes at him. "My hero."

"Chastity, what scared you?" he growled.

"Ooh, Rock, there was a man outside in the cactus! He scared me so much, baby. But you know what would make me feel better? A weekend at that spa I showed you." She gave her most winning smile and waited for him to take the bait.

He frowned, deep lines carving into his granite face. "A trespasser." His eyes flashed red and he plopped her down on the couch. Too stunned to take him to task for his ungentlemanly behavior, she simply sat and gaped as he grabbed the shotgun from over the mantle. "Trespassers. Y'know, this is Texas. All I gotta do is see he's over my boundary line, and I can shoot to kill. Let's see how the bastard likes that."

And with that, he left. Chastity didn't quite know what he meant--he'd used some awfully big words—but she did know he'd left her in her moment of trauma. She'd make him pay for that when he came back—in diamonds.
***
Billy Bob Bobson watched the whole display inside Rock Fangsworthy's house. He had awfully clear windows for someone who sunburned easily, but Billy Bob wouldn't argue with it because he'd had a prime view of the fine woman in his front room. She had a voice like a banshee, but damn was she hot. It almost made up for the cactus needles currently embedded in his tender behind. It was just like a vampire to have pointy blood-drawing things all over his evil lair. When Big Daddy had given him this assignment, Billy Bob thought it would be a piece of cake. Visit the Zillionaire Cowboy Vampire and stake him. But nothing had gone to plan. First, there were bats to contend with. He shuddered. Bats scared the bejesus out of him. Not to mention they always tangled themselves in his long brown hair, even when it was tied back in a neat queue.

He gave a disdainful sniff though his hawk-like nose. Killing Rock Fangsworthy was supposed to be his ticket into the family vampire slaying business, and even though he just wanted to be a day trader, he needed to be in the business to get his share of the family's gazillions before he could do so.

Suddenly and without warning, the front door slammed open and a large-shouldered figure loomed in the opening. Fangsworthy. Billy Bob pocketed his taser and prepared to do battle with the immortal undead. Until he heard the lock and load of a shotgun. His long eyelashes fluttered over his eyes in alarm. Big Daddy didn't mention any gun-wielding demons of the night. All he had was the stake and mallet given to him and the taser he'd picked up at the gun shop in town. Billy Bob disliked guns even more than he did bats.

Billy Bob was too far away to be sure, but he would have sworn the man's incisors grew three inches. "I smell the blood of an Englishman!" Rock roared leoninely, his devilish eyes flashing red.

"Hey, I'm not English, I'm New English!" he replied indignantly. He didn't have any funny accent or eat vegemite!

"Oh, I guess you just have English ancestors. Now show yourself!" he bellowed angrily.

"Not likely, you ill-tempered son of a biscuit-eater!"

Suddenly and without warning, Rock was standing beside him. Billy Bob yelped and stumbled backwards into yet another cactus. "Dagnabbit, why do you have galdarned spiky yard plants, Fangsworthy?"

The man laughed evilly. “For men like you. And judging from your hawk-like nose and coal-black eyes, I'd say you're yet another Bobson here to disrupt my life." Billy Bob rubbed his behind and tried not to look intimidated as Rock leaned closer, towering over him.

"You must be the runt of the family."

Billy Bob growled. "Oh look, the cub thinks he has teeth." Rock's slate-blue eyes glistened in the moonlight and his pearly-white teeth flashed a grin of superiority.

Without thinking, Billy Bob lunged forward, taser in hand. "Billy Bob Bobson!" was his war-cry as he fell around Rock's legs and tasered him at the ankle.

The demon's slate-blue eyes went wide and he stumbled backward. Billy Bob hoped he'd find his way into a cactus, but was sorely disappointed. "Bobson, this is not over," Fangsworthy yelled in his deep, gravelly voice before vanishing into thin air.

Score one for Billy Bob, he thought proudly. He was of half a mind to call Big Daddy and share his first victory, but he really needed a warm hot chocolate first—with extra marshmallows. Hopefully the diner in town carried Swiss Miss.

He took one last gander at the woman silhouetted in the window, her large bazoombas standing out prominently, before picking his way back through the cactus to the road where his Mini Cooper was.

He opened the door and cranked the engine, reveling in the purr of zippy horsepower beneath him, and drove off for his chocolately nightcap.

To be continued... Chapter Five

If you enjoyed this chapter of The Zillionaire Vampire Cowboy's Secret Werewolf Babies, please be sure and join us again next Thursday for the next exciting installment.
You can read more about this exciting serial HERE. And be sure to enter our contest! Rules and information can be found HERE.

21 comments:

jeanette8042 said...

Thanks for another great chapter, I can't wait to read more!

Maria D. said...

Thanks for another chapter!

LORETTA CANTON said...

That was funny.


lorettaC

elaing8 said...

LOL..Great Chapter

Danielle said...

OK! You stole my line! LOL. We have to watch our p's and q's due to children and so I always say "you son of a biscuit eater!" LOL. It will be interesting to see where it goes from here. Maybe Bob can be the pups new chw toy lol.

*yadkny* said...

The dialogue between the characters is hilarious... even when it's supposed to be a serious scene.

Armenia said...

Great chapter. Does a gazillionaire have more zeroes than zillionaire? Hehe.

*taking a Chastity moment*

Dino Rubio said...

I can't wait for next week. I loved it!

Skylar Kade said...

Yay!! I'm so glad everyone likes where the story is going. And we have even more plot twists in store for you!

Debra St. John said...

Oooh, I forgoti t was Thursday until I tuned in! Another great episode...

Sherry said...

Great chapter it was so good. I still think Chastity needs a good smack down. I hope Rock is okay and I can't wait to see what he does to Billy Bob for tasering him.

sstrode@scrtc.com

Juniper Bell said...

Suddenly and without warning, I'm craving some Swiss Miss. ;)

gigis said...

Me and my bazoombas are off to have hot chocolate with extra masrshmellows....lol
Thanks for another fun chapter!
gigi

Denise Golinowski said...

Loved the New English and vegemite. I almost feel sorry for Billy Bob despite his evil intentions. He's so terribly outclassed, but gotta give him points on gumption as well as his PG language under tremendous stress. I wish I had his forebearance. Can't want for the next installment. Now, where is my hot chocolate stash?

Denise Golinowski

Sarah said...

I'm really enjoying this series, I'm very curious to see what happens next with Billy Bob & Rock

Zina said...

I love how he only tasered Him on the angle and then was readdy for a hot cocoa.
Zina

Fiona McGier said...

Oooh, I can't wait for Chastity and Billy Bob! I sense some reprise of the blood in a locket thing like Angelina had going with HER Billy Bob! But will her enhanced boobage fit into his mini Cooper?

Cassandra @ Book & Movie Dimension a Blog said...

This is getting more and more interesting!
ruizcassandra50@gmail.com

Susan said...

OMG, he was using awfully big words? gun-wielding demons of the night? Big Daddy (is this a porn movie LOL)? tasered him at the ankles? hot chocolate with extra marshmallows? ROTFLMAO!!

Cammie said...

Okay, mopping the tears now - Billy Bob Bobson!! Be kind to Chastity, it was how she was raised. She doesn't know a lot of big words but she knows her rocks...

(Hey, lay off the vegemite!)

Unknown said...

This is really good. I waited to read them all together. Glad I did.