Saturday, April 30, 2011

The Naughties Get Smutty with Crystal Jordan

Greeting from sunny California! Okay, I'm kidding. It's actually raining here in my neck of the woods in Cali, but considering I've lived in places where they made me dig my car out from under a small mountain of snow just to get to work every morning, I'll take the rain and not complain.

Right, right. You don't want me to talk about the weather. All righty then, here's how I'm going to roll today. We have a theme we're talking about this week, so I'll play with that. Then I'm going to lay down an excerpt on you from my book that comes out next month. My first full-length novel even, so I'm so excited I could just burst about it. And to make up the fact that I'm throwing down some blatant pimpage on you, I'm going to offer up some free goodness that plays into both my new book and being a Smutketeer.

Eden, naughty girl that she is, told me we should talk about our favorite smutty moment on film. Because we're Smutketeers, don't you know? We know smut when we see it. And, for the record, she said it wasn't allowed to be porn. Well, fine, if you want to limit my creativity that way. Hee.

All right, seriously. Smuttiest film moment. I asked my guy, and he voted for the love scene in Last Tango in Paris, but I haven't watched that one--I may have to now! I have to admit the smutness that revved me up was that sex scene in Brokeback Mountain. Anyone who's seen the movie knows exactly what I'm talking about. Oh, yeah. That late night moment, two hot guys in a tent together and they go from zero to hot sex in about 2.5 seconds. I wasn't the only one getting an embarrassing little flush going in the theater, was I?

Mmm-hmm. Yum. That's definitely the smuttiest moment that comes to mind for me. Jake and Heath worked the hell out of that movie.

While several of my books have guy on guy sex scenes, my upcoming one EMBRACE THE NIGHT is just one guy with one girl. Though, I'm toying with a guy-on-guy-on-girl ménage for later in the series. It might end up being a permanent threesome or one of the guys might go off and find another girl. The characters haven't told me yet. Anyway, enough teasing and on to some real details about the book.

Embrace the NightThey're the Magickal ones...vampires, werewolves, witches, and fae who dwell among humans, united by extraordinary talents and unbridled sexual powers...

Chloe Standish went looking for a one-night stand to erase the memories of her cheating ex--and found the hottest sex of her life. A witch and biochemist working on a cure for werewolves, Chloe knows all about magic, yet Merek Kingston evoked a spellbinding lust beyond anything she'd ever felt. But now her ex-boyfriend and research partner is dead, his part of the formula in terrorists' hands...and the detective in charge is Merek, the same man who's haunted her dreams ever since the frenzied night together.

Chloe is the one person whose future Merek can't predict...the only woman who could make him break every rule just to posses her again. Nothing will stop him from protecting her, and an explosive passion too primal, too perfect to forget...

Where to get EMBRACE THE NIGHT (which comes out on May 31st)--Amazon, Amazon Canada, Barnes & Noble, B-A-M, Borders, Chapters, IndieBound, Powell's


“Mmmph.” Something heavy landed on Chloe's stomach, jerking her out of the erotic dream, the erotic memory. Her heart thundered, sweat slid down her face, and her lungs heaved in a desperate bid for air. Icy fear and hot lust warred for dominance inside her as the fantasy gave way to reality. She shuddered, her fingers balling in soft cotton sheets. Her familiar's eyes glowed in the low lighting of the lamp she'd left on, a freakish little alien head peering down at her. Ophelia blinked, her whiskers twitching. Chloe groaned, shoved the Siamese cat off her belly, and flopped over to bury her face in the pillow. “Gods.”

How many times was she going to have that dream? How often did she have to relive that wild night? It had happened two months ago, and hardly a night had passed that she hadn't had the dream.

Maybe she just needed to get laid. Get that night out of her system. She moaned into her pillow, squeezing her thighs together as a lingering throb of desire went through her. That was how she'd ended up having that night in the first place, by telling herself she needed to get laid, to get her cheating ex out of her system.

That had gone so well for her.

She'd gone out to Sanguine, her favorite Magickals-only private club, scoped out every species of hotty the Magickal community had to offer--elves, Fae, vampires, werewolves, warlocks--mentally debated the sexual gifts each species could bring to the table--bedroom, whatever--and then she'd seen him. After that, there'd been no contest. Chemistry was a bitch like that. She would know--she was a biochemist.

Sighing, she rolled over, kicked the sheet off of her, and forked her hands through her sweaty hair. Her body still burned, her sex aching with a need to be filled with more than just her vibrator. “Damn it.”

Dwelling on her lack of a love life since her one-night stand wouldn't help her. And thinking about Damien-Raines-the scum-sucking-vampire who'd left her for a she-vamp he'd knocked up, which was where her shame spiral had started, wouldn't help her disposition at all. However, the fact that his ferret familiar was probably still hexed into an ugly lampshade made her lips quirk. Vampires sucked at casting spells. Damien had just sucked, period. Too bad it had taken her so long to figure that out.

She heaved herself out of bed and played soccer with Ophelia's sinuous body as she tried to twine herself around Chloe's legs while she walked. Tripping, she hit the swinging door to the kitchen and almost face-planted into the floor. “Damn it, Ophelia.”

The cat sniffed, leaped up onto the counter, and flicked a delicate paw at her food bowl in an unmistakable feline demand. Chloe rolled her eyes and grumbled all the way to the cabinet that contained the outrageously expensive cat cuisine her familiar liked. Dumping the contents into the food dish, Chloe went about retrieving her own sustenance while the cat dug in.

Thirty seconds later, she had a steaming mug of coffee cradled between her palms. The first sip made her moan. “Ahhh.”

Bless the Normal human who'd invented the automatic coffeemaker. Magic did some awesome things, but sometimes Normal technology trumped all. She leaned against her counter and gazed out her kitchen window at the morning mist shrouding her Queen Anne Hill neighborhood, drifting out into downtown Seattle. The city lights were a pretty haze that streaked the skyline. Sunbeams began to pierce the fog, so she knew it would be a rare sunny day in the Emerald City. Yesterday had been wicked hot, too, but Chloe loved the brightness. She'd have to remember to go for a walk during lunch today.

Bon Jovi's “Bad Medicine” blared from her cell phone, jolting her from her reverie, and she jogged into her living room to grab it from the charger. Her best friend, Tess's, name popped up on the caller ID. Grinning, Chloe punched the button to answer. “Dr. Jones, I presume. What are you doing up at the ass crack of dawn this morning?”

“Still haven't slept from last night.” A huge yawn fuzzed the phone line. “We're short-staffed so I pulled a double. Budget cuts.”


“Tell me about it.” Tess worked as a pathologist for the FBI. The Normal side of the FBI. She was one of the most Normal humans Chloe had ever met. “I haven't put in hours this awful since my residency.”

Along with werewolf Jaya Nemov, they'd become friends in med school, which was the only reason Chloe and Jaya had gotten close to anyone outside the Magickal community. Most Magickals didn't bother because it was just too hard to keep people in their lives they had to constantly lie to about who and what they were.

Chloe knew she should probably ease out of her relationship with Tess, but when Jaya died during a full moon Change, it emphasized to Chloe that a good friend was hard to come by, magic or no magic. Tess might never know the truth behind Jaya's death, but she'd still shared the loss of someone they all loved. So, Chloe kept her friend and did what she had to do to keep her secrets.

Then again, a part of her had always wondered if the reason she held on to Tess was because her long-dead mother had been a Normal. She grinned, and it wasn't nice. Her family was almost as horrified that she had befriended a Normal as they had been when her father had married one and bred a halfling.

Another yawn sounded through the phone, recapturing Chloe's attention. Her grin softened and she cradled the phone closer to her ear. “So, you're calling because . . . you want to get together for dinner tonight and tell me more about the suckfest of budget cuts?”

Tess chuckled. “You're a mind reader.”

“Sure. That's totally a plausible explanation, Doctor.” Chloe inserted as much drawling derision into her voice as possible, and Tess laughed. Telepathy wasn't one of Chloe's magical skills, so it wasn't an outright lie, it just wasn't the whole truth. This time. A familiar twist of guilt knotted her insides, but she pushed it aside. Tess was Normal, Chloe was Magickal; there was nothing she could do about the need to prevaricate. “How about you meet me here around seven?”

“Perfect. See ya. I'm hitting the hay now.” The call was punctuated with one final yawn from Tess before both women disconnected.

Chloe went to drop the phone in her purse and saw she'd missed a call about an hour before. There was a voicemail message waiting for her. She hadn't heard the phone ring, but then, why would her subconscious want her to wake up from a steamy episode of her regularly scheduled Merek-dream?

She shoved a hand through her disheveled hair and pushed the reminder of her one-night warlock out of her mind. Flipping her cell over to speakerphone, she accessed her voicemail while she wandered into her bedroom to dress for work.

A deep, silken male voice emerged from her phone. “Chloe, it's Damien.”

Chills crept down Chloe's spine and a hollow feeling settled in the pit of her stomach. The last person she expected to get a call from was Damien. Hell, the last person she wanted a phone call from was Damien. Shaking off that inane thought, Chloe zipped up her skirt and shoved her feet into a pair of ballet flats. While she walked into the bathroom to brush her teeth and hair, she hit the buttons to replay the message she hadn't really listened to.

“Chloe, it's Damien.” A muffled thump sounded in the background of the call, but Damien hurried on. “I'm sorry to bother you at home. Don't erase this . . . I need to talk to you about work. It's . . . It's important to the project. Call me back. Please.” The call ended abruptly, as if someone had stabbed the End button with more force than necessary.

The please gave her pause. Damien never said please. Then again, he also never said I'm sorry. He was a vampire. They were, by definition, coldblooded. They also tended to have superiority complexes and thought everyone, from other Magickal species to Normals, were so far beneath them they didn't even register on their radar. Sure, most of them would stoop to having a fling with a non-vampire, maybe one or two non-vampire friends, just for variety, but anything else was out of the question. They didn't mix.

Luckily, Chloe hadn't wanted more than that from Damien, but she had expected fidelity while they were together. Apparently, that had been beneath him, too. She sighed, disconnected the call, and slid her cell into her pocket.

The worst part about dating someone you worked with was when it ended badly. She'd learned that lesson the hard way. They were both team leads in pharmaceutical R&D for Desmodus Industries, but since those teams were working on the same project, they did see each other, but not that often. Thank the Gods.

Shoving her arms into a jacket, she picked up her handbag and headed for the side door that lead to her detached garage. If the bloodsucker wanted to talk to her about work, he could do it when she got there.

She wasn't calling him back.


Since you made it to the end of the blog post, here's what you can win. Just make a comment on this post--tell me what your favorite paranormal being is, since I have so many I'll be playing with in the EMBRACE THE NIGHT series--and you're entered to win a pair of copper “Wicked Witch” earrings AND your very own copy of the book. They're kind of steampunky, which is Smutketeer-ish, and the wicked witch label fit my new book, so I just couldn't pass them up when I saw them on Etsy (this contest is limited to people in the continental US. Sorry!).

Wicked Witch Copper Earrings

Hope it was good for you too!

-Crystal Jordan

All for Smut, and Smut for all!


June M. said...

My favorite paranormal being would have to be Vamps! I would love to win a copy of this book. It sound great. And the guy is HOT!

manning_j2004 at yahoo dot com

StacieDM said...

I love shifters. I especially love wolf shifters. I like how Alpha and feral they are. They are possessive, protective and loyal. They are less controlled than vamps. I like the danger that creates. You never know if you will get the man or the wolf.

user1123 AT comcast DOT net

Virginia C said...

Hi, Crystal! Vampires are awesome. There are Vamps of all types, but the indelible image of a tall, dark, handsome and powerfully compelling male Vampire remains the touchstone. "When a Vamp loves a woman", she is not just food for thought...she is his "soul provider". The Vampire's bite is primal and potent. The allure of the Vampire is the elemental surrender of the prey to its hunter. Carnality is often obscured beneath captivating, courtly charm. Perhaps it is barely contained within sleek, scintillating sexuality. A Vampire may kill in a gross and gory feeding frenzy or he may partake in slow, sensual supper of depletion of will.

gcwhiskas at aol dot com

kittykelly28 said...

I can't pick between my vamps and my kitty shoifters :( I love them both way too much! :) Damn do voodoo kings count in that mix too? Shit there are too many I can't do it! I love them all!!!!


Harlie Reader said...

Mine would be vamps or wolf shifters. I love those earrings.

Glad yall had fun over here this week.

Harlie Reader said...

Hey, are yall going to do this again? Change blogs? Great idea, whoever came up with it.

Christina said...

I am with Kelly, it is SOOO hard to choose! I guess I am gonna stick with the vamps though, gotta love the biting ;)

flchen1 said...

Mmm... I think wolf and big cat shifters, but vamps are pretty hot, too, Crystal! Great excerpt--cannot wait to get my hands on my own copy! And those earrings? Gorgeous!

f dot chen at comcast dot net

JM said...

Vamps are cool, but if it has a Gargoyle shifter in it, it's an auto-buy for me. Love Gargoyles.
The excerpt sounded wonderful! May have to add this one to the stack too. Sigh...too many wonderful books to choose from with you girls.

CarolB1977 said...

Hi Crystal! My current favorite paranormal creatures are shifters. I'm partial to the big cats- tigers, lions, leopards, etc. But I love all paranormal *romantic* creatures.

Anonymous said...

OOOHHH Crystal,
First congrats again on a novel and Merek reminds me of that time travel movie with Gerard Butler where he plays Merek, movie title escapes me at the moment. I'd have to say wolf shifters not the kind that shift into horrendas wolfs the regular huge wolfs like in the Twilight series, ah yes corny I know but thats the size I think of huge. The earings are fab too so I hope I win this one. BTW Grandson Greyson arrived yesterday and he smells so sweet.

Bratty said...

Crystal, I don't have a favorite paranormal critter. They all seem to pretty much follow the paths, though for the most part. How about something really interesting though? Like a giant butterfly shifter? Has that been done? :)

And yeah, just thinking about that scene in BBM can make one flush! You weren't the only one....

outredgeous at gmail dot com

Kelly Jamieson said...

Welcome to the Naughty Nine, Crystal! I have to agree with you on that hot movie moment - I loved Brokeback Mountain!

@ Marika - glad you're enjoying this and yeah, I sure hope we do it again some time, it's been so fun!

Bonnie Jean said...

Big cat shifters and vampires. YUM. And the excerpt is totally intriguing (what WAS that "thump"?? I *have* to know!)
Thanks for sharing, Crystal!

Maria said...

I don't have a big preference because I love vampires,shifters,witches, fae but if I have to choose, I think that I prefer shifters

Loved the excerpt! Adding this to my wishlist.

Mindy said...

Hi Crystal :)
I LOVE the excerpt, Ophelia is such a spoiled baby and Damien better have a GOOD excuse for the thump in the background.
I'm very much into shifters (cats and weres).


Karen Erickson said...

I love those earrings Crystal. And I'm partial to fallen angels right now since I'm writing about them. :)

Toni said...

No no no no. I don't wanna pick!! I love them all. My mood changes by the position of the moon in the sky. I just went thru a shifter phase. So if I HAVE to pick, then shifters, but they do have a lovely range of different types.

I really like the sound of this story. I'm writing the name down NOW.

Thanks for the great giveaway!

tsteinerid (

Pommawolf Emeraldwolfeyes said...

Love the excerpt!

My favorite will always be the wolf shifters. Hence the wolf part of my handle for last 12 years....*S*
I hear the wild wolves howl on the backside of my mountain here, and I still get shivery....*S*

Their hot, all alpha and believe me they got that special umph that gets my motor running...LOL

Thank you!


pommawolf @ hotmail dot com

Modokker said...

I'm going to go with Vampires. Hot alpha vampires lol Beautiful earrings.

Lisa B
modokker at yahoo dot com

Skylar Kade said...

Thanks, Blogger, for eating my first comment.

I'm partial to mages though they aren't too popular right now. It's that whole "magic hands" thing that gets me. And vampires *shiver* with all their neck-biting.

Eden Bradley said...

Am I the only one who hasn't seen Brokeback Mountain? Must make some time to watch more movies!
I know I'm not eligible but I *love* those earrings! And as most of you know, I love my vampires-something so mysterious and sexy about them. But I also love demons, fallen angels...

Cathy M said...

I read so many paranormal romances that this is a tough choice. But I tend to read more shifter stories, and love the big cats and the wolves.

caity_mack at yahoo dot com

Susan said...

Great earrings!!

My favorite is also big cat shifters. Fierce, yet cuddly with the right person/mate!

Can't wait to read this one!

susanmik AT gmail DOT com

joder said...

I'm such a paranormal junkie that I hate to pick just one, they're all sexy! But by a slim margin I'll choose vampires. I love the darkness surrounding them and that whole bad boy vibe surrounding them.

joderjo402 AT gmail DOT com

Pommawolf Emeraldwolfeyes said...

I haven't seen BrokeBack Mountain. Thanks for the boink in the head, and now I will put it on my Netflixs *S*
Thank God for them. I can get movies 3x's a week clear up here, but get Blockbuster even once a month. Go figure?

Jean P said...

Love the excerpts, always have been a fan of shifters, especially wolves, something about the eyes, they pierce right through you, and you just never know what might set them off.

skpetal at hotmail dot com

Jennifer Mathis said...

im on a demon kick right now but i love all paranormal

Sherry said...

My favorite paranormal being is shifters. I like any kind of shifter but if I had to choose just one kind it would be wolf shifters. Thanks for the great week it's been a lot of fun.

JoAnna said...

Loved thed excerpt!!! Can't wait to read it!
My favorite paranormal being are shifters. Big cat shifters are the best!!

Joy said...

Vamps! Vamps! Vamps! I want be with my hero forever & I have a neck fetish to boot (whahah), so vamps are my mewl-worthy must have paranormal beings

JaneE2059 said...

I love different paranormal beings in different ways, but I'd say shifters and witches. Your books sounds good.

Milinda said...

I have to say that my favorites are the shifters--feline and wolf, although which order is up for grabs. They're both touchy-feely which is a very good thing. ;-)

I already am in love with Ophelia.

daydrmzzz said...

Omg go get Brokeback mountain very hot!! N I'm a vamp girl but getting into the shifters lately :)

Beth said...

Love shifters the most. Especially dragons and bears. Big cats and wolves are good too.

Can't wait to read Embrace the Night.
Those earrings are pretty, but no way could I ever wear them. Me and copper jewelry don't mix well, unless I intend to turn parts of me green, before they get all red and swollen.

donnas said...

Congrats on the release! Looking forward to picking it up.

I love all paranormals but I am still partial to the vampire for a favorite.

bacchus76 at myself dot com

iread2xs said...

I like shape shifters, especially if they are big cats. What could be better that snuggling up with a live fur coat? Your book sounds good and i can't wait to read it. Julie

Jennifer Leeland said...

Love the earrings.
My favorite paranormal type person is a witch.

Lil said...

Favorite paranormal being would be a dragon shifter.

Crystal Jordan said...

Yep, I'm LATE! I totally suck. Okay, my winner is...Modokker/Lisa B.

I'll send you an email in a few to work out details!